Secrets...

"Got a secret? Can you keep it? Swear this one you'll save. Better lock it in your pocket, taking this one to the grave. If I show you I know you wont tell what I said, 'cause two can keep a secret if one of them is dead..." 

Secrets... We've all got 'em. We all tell 'em.
We keep the things that are so hurtful, embarrassing, and outrageous to ourselves... We never tell another afraid of judgement, criticism, and being teased. We keep our secrets. We hide them deep within ourselves and vow to never tell another soul....
Yet we fail miserably at keeping secrets. We all somehow manage to tell someone and make them vow to not tell anyone else, but in turn they go and tell someone else and make them vow not to tell and the cycle goes on and on until soon what was once a secret is now public information on the down low.
But truthfully it's not a secret until someone else knows. That's what makes it a secret. It's information that's shared between two people... Until soon it's more than just those two people who know your secret.
Now here's my theory on secrets. If you want to keep it a secret don't tell anyone. Not a soul. When you don't tell anyone then you don't have to worry about someone finding out. It's not public information. It's a genuine secret. I believe that keeping a diary is a better way of hiding your secrets... well at least until your sneaky little brother, or mom finds your diary. If they Respected you they wouldn't dare read it, but some families just are nosy and have no respect for boundaries.
I personally keep a diary. And if someone were to first off ever find my diary, and let alone read they truly would have their hands on gold. Some secrets on another note shouldn't even be written down. They don't need to exist verbally, or physically. They need to be kept within the walls of our mind and never meant to see the light of day, to breathe a breath of oxygen. To disappear in our memories along with so many other memories that disappear daily. Those type of secrets are deadly. They can break people, even ruin their lives...
If someone should trust you enough to share with you their secrets, you shouldn't share someone else's secrets. If they told you in confidence, it should never be repeated. never told to another soul. Not a one. Don't betray someone's trust. If they trust you enough to share with you, you should take that as a compliment. Don't ever use someone's secrets against them either. If you two just so happen to fall out with one another don't as revenge try to exploit their secrets. That's low down, and childish. Be bigger than that.
Got a secret? Better keep it. This one you should save.

Emptiness

How can you possibly have it all, and still be unhappy?
How can you have everything that you wanted, well at least almost everything you wanted, and still be so unhappy? Still feel so miserable, so helpless, so alone, when you're the furthest thing from alone. There's an emptiness that sits in your chest. But yet that emptiness is so heavy and hurts. But you don't know why. Why does it hurt? Why do you feel so empty when you have it all? There's not much more you could ask God for and yet you still feel like there's something so important that you don't have and desperately need but don't know what it is.
You have a great life. Friends that love you, adore you, support you, would do anything in the world for you.
You have an amazing family even though they're crazy. They support you in every way imaginable. They push you to do better and be better and at the end of the day they'll always be there.
You have love. You have someone there who loves you so much. They adore you and everything about you including your flaws. You may never know why they feel the way the do, and you may question it all the time but they do.
So whats missing?
Whats this emptiness that you feel?
You've got it all... or so you think...

How I know...

I'm beginning to think that there's no such thing as "the one" but rather we find someone and we try our hardest to make it work. That's obviously just me and my realist ways... Of course we want to believe that some mystical feeling will overcome us and we'll just suddenly know. No. I think we find someone who makes us think "hey, this might work." Maybe just being with them feels right, it feels natural. So maybe that's how you know. Just laying in bed with them and thinking to yourself, "I could do this for the rest of my life." or at least at that moment you think you could do it for the rest of your life. It's crazy though how it can just suddenly hit you. You're just walking down the street holding hands and it suddenly dawns upon you that hey, this could be my forever and once you realize it you spend the rest of your life trying to make it last forever which is a true test. I think these days people get married without thinking about the actual issues that come along with marriage. Their so stuck in infatuation that they fail to even consider anything that could go wrong. Which is why so many marriages end up in divorce. How do you resolve a argument? How do you communicate with the other when something is wrong? Money issues? Stress? Work? You have to consider everything. You can't just jump into it then everything is just perfect and works itself out. It doesn't work like that. It's work, and if your not willing to make it work then obviously you weren't the one for them, and they weren't the one for you. Hence forth there's no such thing as the one.