What now?

It's now the end of the year... The final days are now upon us. NOW is not the time to make these "make it or break it" decisions... It's too late for all of that, but yet here I am. In the midst of one of the most confusing situations to ever be caught in. Caught between what I WANT to do and what i NEED to do. Obviously this seems like it would be an easy decision. DO what you need to do... but what i want is equally important. *Now i dont want to say to much but i obviously will sooo w/e*
The WANT: Here's what i want to do

• I want to set out and do what i've been wanting to do all year long. I should go after whats mine. If i want it bad enough i can have it! (feeling a tad bit cocky) Im not a quiter, i never give up. Thats not who i am. Whenever someone tells me no i just find another way to get what i want. And right now i know exactly what i want, and i want to go after it. But *excuse me as i quote* "If we do the unthinkable would it make us look crazy?" Because Im thinking about taking a chance... But if i do would you look at me crazy? Would it be awkward between us? And while im debating time is just ticking away... Slipping out of my hands... im running out of time... and running out faster than i know it. I want this. It's the end to the story. The last piece to the puzzle, the last page of the story. Completion. The story began with a kiss... and will end with one. if i have my way. (I think of like the princess and the frog because the whole story began when she kissed the frog. Maybe my Frog will turn into a prince?) But that would mean i would have to kiss the "frog." can you say awkward? and im not one for emotional confrontation which is why this is happening this late in time. Then there's the aspect of me being a punk. If i punk out after deciding to go through with this i will never forgive myself. I'll be mad at myself and Regret it for being suck a punk. Do i really want to end it off wondering "what if?"

The NEED: here's what i need to do

• I need to Just stick it out. It's the end of the year. It's almost over. I need to just Be done....I need to be strong willed and move on with life. Stop holding on to the little things that keep me here. Stop holding on to this dim glimmer of hope that things will change. Because i've been hurt, but by my own fault. I let myself get hurt. I'm the one who let him in, and allowed for such nonsense to happen infront of my face. For me to let him back in willingly is foolish and stupid on so many different levels. I've been teased about the frog so much. I've cursed and hurt other people to get my point across that i was done with him knowing deep down that the reason im mad was because i wasnt. Then if i take a chance i look like the idiot for letting him hurt me and not learning my lesson the FIRST time... Then i have to go back on everyone after everything and explain how i wasnt done. *Even though it's non of their business* I need to just let it go. Be done with him and Stick it out.

So what do i do? Do i kiss the Frog who could possibly be a prince? OR do i let The Frog stay a Frog and move on with life?